Question.

I went to the East Asian Games Volunteers Recognition Ceremony last night and while the ceremony itself wasn’t really as grand or exciting as the emails sent to us had made to be, it was still a nice little evening to meet the other volunteers whom I worked with (even for a mere 15 hours) during the football matches at the Hong Kong Stadium. The arrangements for the seating was pretty weird too, as the few of us who bothered to turn up were all given seats in different sections, and when we were still waiting for another of our fellow volunteer, we were being asked to be seated. When we asked the person who were making us be seated that we wanted to sit together but our tickets were of different sections, we were hit by what I must think was the question of the day:

"Why didn’t you come together?"

The 5 of us were speechless when we heard such a question, not because we couldn’t conjure up an answer, but more because the question was surely about the weirdest of all possible questions. After giving it a quick thought, I came up with a few possible scenarios that prompted him to ask us that question:

– We were supposed to be working or studying at the same place because we know one another, so surely we must be able to leave office/school together and arrive at the venue together.

– As volunteers we should have a very strong team spirit so whatever we do we must do together.

I thought it would have been so much better if he had actually said "Actually if you guys come into the stadium together you would have been given tickets in the same section", because I think that’s what he really tried to say. Though he did tell us to exchange our tickets with the main reception so that we can be seated together subsequently, I still think the question was a wee bit out of this world.

Ultimately what happened inside the stadium as far as seating is concerned made the whole thing even weirder – the ushers were telling people to sit in another section even though the ticket indicated otherwise. I wonder why all the trouble of assigning sections for people to sit in? I think for most of us who were not getting awards, it didn’t really matter where we were sitting. Sometimes it does baffle me that they choose to make simple things difficult, and then make themselves look bad in the process.

Work.

Life has been pretty hectic for me since the turn of the year. So far I must say the year has been full of ups and downs even though barely 3 weeks have gone by. I guess that’s what make life interesting – you can’t have all ups and all downs, instead God will pave a way for you according to His will, and we must learn to be grateful for everything that He’s planned for.

I’m almost 4 months into my job here at VTC, and while I still enjoy the experience here, the stress is by no means light. Sometimes I do stop and wonder about whether I’m in the right job, but I guess it’s still way too early for me to consider that. I mean, when I talk about whether I’m in the right job, it’s not so much about whether the position itself suits me, but rather whether the nature of the jobs that I’ve been in is suitable for me. For the past 2 years or so, I’ve been working in an administrative capacity, so I’m always handling administrative matters. Many of my friends, especially those in Singapore, have often been amazed by the fact that I am working in an administrative role. Perhaps the image I portrayed to them in the past was always one who creates something new, enjoy the experience of planning and executive activities, enjoy talking to people. To be honest, sometimes I’m surprised with myself too, given that I’ve gotten out of an administrative job and jumped straight into another one. And if you asked me whether I’d work as an admin person 5 years ago, I would have thought that you must have gone crazy. Now it seems like the one who’s gone crazy is me!

Whatever it is, I’m still going to be here for quite a while, and I really am not upset about my job or am looking to get out. In fact I still treasure each day as a new experience, it’s just that sometimes you do get that random bout of siansation in which you either try to get over it or get even with it. Of course, I still have 2 months to go in my 6-month probation period, so they could technically still get rid of me with a month’s notice, and I suppose I’ll still have to continue to work hard and perform well! But I know I can depend on God who gave me this job. I know I haven’t been doing my devotions frequent enough, I haven’t been praying enough, and I haven’t been faithful enough, and for that I know I am not pleasing Him. But I know He’s willing to give me strength and power to overcome whatever that comes my way.

"Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 3:13-14, NIV)

Children.

I think I’m someone who loves children.

Initially when I was asked to help in the children’s worship at my church, I was wondering – would I scare the kids off? Would my size and my voice be so frightening to them that it would make them cry? But as it turns out, the kids in the children’s worship seem to have taken to me pretty well, and I think they enjoy my company. But I think more importantly is I could help share God’s words with the children, and helping them learn more about God.

I didn’t realize I actually love children so much before I became a Christian – I guess when you go to services on a Sunday morning, children are the bunch of people you’ll bound to come across, and I really love playing with them, making them laugh, and make them happy.

But of course, children learn from adults, which is why I have to be very careful and bne very mindful of what I show to the children. I need to make sure my words to them are right, my attitude towards them is right, and the example I set to them must be one befitting of a good Christian. I know I’m far from being a good Christian yet, and I know I must keep learning. It’s not going to be easy, but I’ll try my best.

2010

A new decade is here, and while I’m happy that a new year is here, there’s still a tinge of disappointment as this is the year which I will hit the big three-zero. Not fun, but then life goes on, doesn’t it? As did previous years, it’s time to look at 2009, and that 365 days that have come and gone.

10 – East Asian Games Volunteer in December.
9 – Part of the organizing team for the Intervarsity Speech Contest while I was still in BU.
8 – Got a Distinction for my Masters degree.
7 – 5.5 Mayday concerts in a year. (twice in Hong Kong, twice in Taipei, once in Kaohsiung and half in Macau)
6 – Witnessed the Hong Kong football team crowned champions in the East Asian Games.
5 – A new job, returning to VTC where I started my working life in Hong Kong.
4 – Osaka in June, Seoul in September
3 – A memorable class reunion with my primary schoolmates in Hong Kong (we all knew one another for 20 years already?)
2 – Witnessed Shumin’s wedding, narrowly missed Juana’s.
1 – Finding God and getting baptized.

Is it that once I have started working I am getting more or less memories of what I’ve done throughout the whole year? Just like last year, I had some problems trying to recall whaet I did for the whole year, and while I’m sure there must be more than these 10 things, I can’t seem to remember any of those things. Or perhaps they are not as important, I guess.

Now let’s look back at the resolutions that I made at the start of last year, and see what’s my hit rate like.

10 – Learn driving and get a driving license, and if possible, buy a car. Haha.
Failure: I somehow contrived to have forgotten all about it, even though my church is kind of next to the driving school.

9 – Finding that special someone.
Failure: I had (and perhaps should say still have) my target, but things are not working out – for the moment, at least.

8 – Graduate in my Masters course with a Distinction.
Success: I think I’m the only one in my cohort that have gotten it – credits must go to my project mates for their hardwork which contributed to my Distinction.

7 – A new job for the sake of a new challenge.
Success: Returning to VTC was great so far.

6 – Visit Japan again.
Success: Osaka in June. I had great fun there.

5 – Be nice to people.
Partial Success: I think I have been nicer to most people. I think

4 – Continue to know more people from different areas.
Success: Quite hard to measure, but my namecard holder is increasing in content.

3 – Pass JLPT3.
Failure: I signed up for the test, paid the test fee, and then missed the test itself.

2 – Try to complain less.
Failure: If I complain less then I’m not me already.

1 – Stay healthy.
Success: 1009 has been good for me as I didn’t visit the doctor that often compared to the previous 2 years.

A success rate of 55%, can’t be too bad, can it? But I guess if I had made some more measurable goals it would be easier to see whether I actually hit them.

And then as usual, the wishlist for the year:

10 – Cut down on my spendings. I think I’ve been spending too much.
9 – Learn driving (finally).
8 – Try losing a bit of that extra weight that have been a good friend with me for the past couple of years.
7 – Do another Masters.
6 – Watch more Hong Kong football.
5 – Update my journal more often.
4 – Visit Korea again.
3 – Contribute more consistently with the Children’s Worship.
2 – Be closer with God.
1 – Find that special someone (and hopefully she loves God too).

2009 ended very quietly for me as I didn’t really do much. 2010 also didn’t start very much on a high for me too as I also didn’t really do much. I guess since I’ve already grown older, I don’t think I need to spend my time outside celebrating these “festivals” as much as I’ve done when I was younger. I guess when the number in my age column keeps going up, the more mellowed I’ll become? Deep inside, I actually just want to spend this kind of time with people who are special to me. For another year that didn’t happen to me, but I guess as I become more mellowed, I’m not entirely too bothered by that. I know God will arrange for me.

Have a great new year ahead, and hopefully 2010 will be a better year for everyone!